Therapy

Writing has always been my biggest outlet. I remember begging my mom for a small notebook that was shaped like a denim pocket- I found it at a gas station when I was young for $1.99. I remember her saying yes, maybe it was my grandma, I can’t remember- but regardless I got a yes.

Every day after school I wrote in this little book-stupid stuff, about my crush, or how a friend hurt my feelings. Then I took this book with me to my first Florida trip. I remember venting to my pages about how I was chewing my gum to avoid my ears popping, and I talked myself through staying calm with my pen to paper.

When I went to Universal Studios I had all of the characters sign in this book. When I got home I lost the book and was devastated- not for the autographs, but for my journalism. I feel like it was a connection with myself.

I remember in high school we wrote Autobiography’s. This was huge for me because I’ve always wanted to write a book, and although no one may have given a shit about all of the pain I put into the pages- I noticed how therapeutic pouring my heart into pages was.

When I entered college I almost wanted to go for journalism because of my passion for writing, but I soon realized I wrote for me, not for others- I still do. Well, and to the dozen of you who actually take time to read these words.

In Elementary I had the pleasure of having one of my poems published by Alan Shawn Feinstein. In middle school I won an essay writing prompt for the state. I just heard words in my head and put them to paper. My creative side I found at an early age with my words.

Years after beginning this blog I started to neglect it. I feel like bloggers blog to blog. Blog for money, blog to show off their materials, blog to inspire or give little tricks to their readers. It’s all great, but I stopped because I don’t like stereotypes. I don’t like calling myself an “influencer.” I am a leader. I learned that when my mental health was being sacrificed because of following a 9-5, just for a paycheck.

I am deciding to transform this site a little. I don’t want to post my fashion on here anymore. You can find my styling, my brags and boasts on my other outlets. I want to come back to square one. I want this platform to be used as therapy. Advice, inspiration; for all ages.

My whole life I’ve been transparent with people. My bosses, my family, my friends. Now at almost 28 years old I’ve learned huge hurtful realities: no one has the same heart as us. People only choose to share their best selves with us, and people may not even meet you 1/2 way when you exude 150%. Many of you probably already knew this. I already learned this, then had to re learn this lesson over and over until I finally learned to accept this. The reality is, some people are scared to be vulnerable, to trust 100% because a lot of us are misunderstood, and many people have allowed their trust issues to over power their faith. And this is okay! Because of this though, sometimes it’s easier for people to turn to podcasts, books, blogs to take advice, or listen to others. It’s comfortable for people to let their guards down behind closed doors.

I’ve always battled back and forth about allowing too much of myself on the internet, and in person over exuded myself to far too many people. However, in today’s society many people find comfort on the internet. It’s powerful man. Today I just want to keep it short and sweet and explain that writing really is the best form of therapy for me, aside from my at home workouts. My sister bought me a journal which I promised myself to write in on my bad days. It allows me to feel the emotion, and instantly release it. During New Moons I write to myself or those who have hurt me, or have a cord attached to me, and then I burn these pages and let them go.

If there is something you are going through currently that doesn’t go an hour without crossing your mind, and it’s taking a toll on your energy- write.

I began a book a few months ago and ended up deleting all of it. I noticed I was being too blaming on the conditions in my life, and realized I didn’t like the energy in the chapters. Crazy how thoughts become words and how powerful these run our entire lives.

Here’s my first post venting. Encouraging all of you to vent to yourselves as well. Go out and grab a journal. We all have phones- use the Notes app. Something about pen to paper is way more therapeutic though.

If any of you need advice, an ear, a shoulder- I’m here to help, answer, and listen.

Writing brings out the kid in me, what brings out the inner child in you?

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Woah. Time to glow.

Guys!!! It has seriously been a long long long time coming. I re-downloaded my blog app, and I’ve never been more excited to share my journey with you all.

I always forget how therapeutic it is to write out my experiences. I spent the past 11 months working a 9-5. More like a 1-10pm that left me with very little satisfaction-but I pushed through, up until yesterday. Yesterday I decided to quit my job. Full force, no notice to my co-workers, no 2 week notice. An email sent, and boom I released myself.

It was time to focus all of my energy back into myself; My family. Before I am a mother I am a 27 year old strong, powerful, creative woman. I have so much to offer back to myself- and then the world. I needed to reinvest into my visions, my dreams, MY goals. Not 9 hour shifts that left me drained, regretful, and anxious. I had to do this, especially to make sure I was able to be the best mom and wife I can be.

Don’t get me wrong these past 11 months taught me so much about myself, the world around me, and most importantly it re-opened my eyes to exactly why I never wanted to settle for a corporate job- my dreams, goals and requests will never compare to a store managers goal to hit the month. I was slaving for someone else’s dreams that didn’t impact my mental health, nor my pocket.

I do not want to put too much regret into my experiences because as I said-this year has taught me so so so much! I met some amazing people, and learned all the lessons god gave me. Throughout this 9-5 life, I also got very very embedded in my spiritual journey. I met investors who believed in my vision for my shoe design, and I also applied to be Executive of Design & Marketing for a start up brand! If it wasn’t for my faith, and following my intuition, I would have never taken jumps towards these goals of mine.

Because of being so in touch with my higher self, I knew this is where my path had to end; and begin. I am finally in my power again, and right now I feel vulnerable but so sure about myself.

To anyone battling with depression, anxiety, overthinking, unhappiness, (any mental health battle) just know that sometimes it’s best to just push that reset button. If there’s something you’ve wanted to do and have been waiting for the right time: now is that time. We are the only ones in control of our own happiness. We cannot be happy with our lives unless we are happy with our present. And of course every day and every moment won’t be so “great,” but those were my 11 months. Not “great,” but I pushed. Just know that during those days I was still happy at how far I had come from even the 11 months before then.

I cannot wait to share more with you all-in hopes to inspire more like-minded individuals to jump. Take the dive. Live every day pushing towards your dreams-even the ones everyone thinks you’re absolutely crazy for.

It feels great to write again, talk soon-

Xx 4o1fierce

Self care, aware

Like I always say..it’a been forever y’all! I’ve been working working working working working…lol and trying my best to make the most of my summer with my girls! Sometimes I get so caught up in the day to day, that days become months and it scares the hell out of me. Especially with Ivory turning two- where does time go! And, literally Avynn lost her first tooth today- it’s crazyyyyy!

With working, and building a brand my time has felt so limited- I’m sure you all feel this way with your busy lives as well. Where do we find balance? How? Working out, seeing friends, 9-5’s, etc Welp, i’ve found that what’s been worse for me is pushing the “little” things to the side- which really aren’t so “little.” James and I have been working, picking the girls up, home, eat, sleep, repeat. This is why I find so much pride in working out and taking care of how my body feels/looks- in order to tackle my goals.

However, for way too long now, we’ve been neglecting the relaxation time of being a family. Our car was cluttered, our apartment was cluttered, and for months it’s been driving me insane. Why not just clean it? I gave up- I literally would clean to then see our car and our home wrecked in 2 days. It sounds so stupid coming out, but now I realize exactly why. I would rather spend time outside the apartment, with the girls whether at the beach, or an adventure. Then we would get home before dinner time, cook, eat, and sleep. I found myself not even wanting to be at home. I was escaping my own reality. IT SOUNDS RIDICULOUS I KNOW! 

So why did it take me so long? No idea, but how did I fix it? This is what this post is eventually getting to – haha

I have been meditating like crazy before bed so it honestly allows me to wake up with a clear mind, and a motivated one (on top of burning sage before bed and in the morning). I woke up helped my sister with my niece and nephew while she started her new job, and then I was hit with a crazy wave of motivation. I cleaned the entire car out, then stopped at the store to get new cleaning products, and ended up back at home putting laundry away, and cleaning every single room top to bottom. James got home, we stopped at the mall to let Ave pick out some school clothes, and then stopped at the grocery store! I ran in, spent $100 in groceries, then went home and cooked a beautiful dinner, accompanied by some flowers that legit light up the room!

THIS TYPE OF DAY WAS EVERYTHING I NEEDED!!!!!!!!!!!

I de-cluttered my living spaces, and decided to make a huge meal so that I could bring left overs to work. I enjoyed a huuuuuge glass of wine- lol and went to sleep satisfied!

Most times going out to eat is enjoyable, although the girls make it crazy. Most times hanging at someone else’s house is enjoyable, but relaxing at home at the end of a crazy day is great.

I didn’t mention the fact that I got rid of an entire trash bag full of clothing that I ripped out of my closet. I felt sooooo amazing getting all of the junk out of my zone. And lastly, instead of spending $100 on a night out to eat I re-created one of James and my fav meals from one of our date spots (A twist on Rasta Pasta from Red Parrot)

Here are some photos:

If you can take anything from this post, know that all things in your space, affect your energy 100% so starting with where you lay your head is most important! Take time for yourself, it doesn’t mean spending $ or indulging all the time. De-cluttering literally gave me such a fresh start to this month!!

I have so much more to share with you all, hope you enjoyed

xx, 4o1fierce

HI! HEY! HELLO!// Why I waist train

Like I always say…it’s been way too long. But seriously…it has. I had a notification sent to me that it’s been awhile since I’ve posted, and they’re so so right! I’ve been back to work, trying to balance everything else as well as keep up with this “blogging thing.” haha

But in all seriousness I really wanted to hop on here to make a habit of this again- not because I have to but I miss it. Writing for me/journalism has been a HUGE passion of mine, since 4th grade when I had to write my first “reflection” on Maniac McGee.

Blogging is like venting, however I love it even more for the inspiration-side. I blog clothing, and that all started while pregnant ( to help women/mamas embrace who they are always). It’s most beautiful when you feel comfortable in your skin! But I also love to blog to answer questions, give you all tips and tricks- as well as how I “handle” mom life haha

So starting today, I am making the decision to finally blog again- because I have been “fast posting.” This is when I just take photos on Instagram, with no explanations or tips- just to post quick, and keep my content up-to-date. Because of this, unfortunately I’ve been neglecting my WordPress blog as well as my Youtube Vlog. But.guys!!!!!!!!

I’ll be vlogging again before the end of July since i’ll be investing in a brand new camera- this means content upon content. And your fav-Life in the Fierce Lane (James and I raising two crazy, beautiful beanies)!

So end of the intro here, I want to finish this post before my lunch break ends!

For now on, I will be posting “short cut” swipe-up links on my Instagram that bring my readers directly here to read my blog posts! I don’t want to just be a “Scroll on an IG feed.” I want to make sure I’m embracing all inspirations through my blog.

Today’s topic that’s always asked about is totally fitness related! Especially relatable for my mama readers-Waist training!!

I know, I know I’ve heard it all- “it smooshes/moves your organs,” “it’s dangerous,” “it’s fake.” So I wanted to just clarify the amount of time you wear a trainer for/when you wear it matters most. I began waist training (on and off) since after my first pregnancy. I had a huge umbilical hernia after giving birth to Avynn ( allll 9lb 4.5oz of her) Yikes!

After working out between both daughters, short after Ivory was born I discovered my bloating seriously wouldn’t go away. I’ve always had a bloated stomach as a child/teen, so that wasn’t anything abnormal, but pain, fatigue and extra bloating caused me to undergo 2 surgeries. I had my hernia repaired after Avynn, and then again after Ivory.

My OBGYN suggested the waist trainer postpartum to help my abdominal walls “meet again.” I waist train for about 2 hours a day. It helps my posture, and I see an immediate difference afterwards ( especially with tightening of my skin).

I also wear my waist trainer while working out ( on days I have dairy/junk) because this helps my results quicker, as well as a huge sweat-out.

I find that wearing it while working out straightens my posture and helps me bang out my workouts 10x quicker!

After Ivory my stomach was crazzzzzzyyyy different so I even began wearing my waist cincher in blog photos to avoid the bloat on camera! I think this was the greatest little trick after giving birth, that’s a big controversy to a lot of people. I don’t feel my trainer is too tight or damaging! At most I may get red skin haha

If you guys have any more questions or want to know more tips about how I waist train ( what creams I use, what workouts I do with it, sizing, brand etc) comment here or send me a direct message on my Instagram at @kashaxmarie

There’s no such thing as an immediate “bounce-back” or a “snatched waist” after becoming a mama! What you see via the internet is 9x out of 10 : 1. purchased 2.photoshopped

Howvever, there is hope! With some tips and tricks my transformation is starting to shock me more and more!

xx, 4o1fierce

Spring peakin’ w/prints!

Another day that started beautiful, and then reminds us how crazy New England weather is -eye roll

March is almost over and the minute the sun shines, best believe I’ve been taking full advantage haha

I’ve had this outfit for months and months but finally decided to whip it out! I looooove love love love love love mixing. I’ve been called tacky, corny, old-grandpa-ish

I want to focus on skirts today! Since I was younger I was so self conscious of my legs (especially in skirts). They resembled 2 toothpicks, then two hot dogs haha

However, I never realized how versatile they could be!! I’ve worn this skirt on the weekend with a graphic tee and sneakers, and today I decided to dress it up!

Like I said a thousand times I love to wear prints, just wait and see how I begin to clash them!! Don’t be scared ladies, there are never any rules I swear!

I decided to pair this outfit with these little white booties for a classic twist! I was also in gooooood need of a tan-and some moisturizer on my knees- yikes

It’s been awhile since I’ve just put together outfits for me, for the sake of embracing my creativity. Sometimes we get so caught up in the day-by-day that we forget to outshine our creativity to the fullest.

This was also before I completely chopped more hair off- and toned it rose gold! Can’t wait to show you guys!

I guess you can say I’ve been itching for a change, and staying bold!

I purchased this skirt from my favorite local boutique here in Rhode Island called Elle G ( I’ve mentioned them several times-as well as included this skirt in a haul last month on my YouTube Channel). If you’re interested in this skirt here are my fav selling points-

•It has pockets!

• It’s stretchy!

• It buttons up instead of zips!

• Versatile material so it looks great dressed up or dressed down!

Purchase here – Gingham Skirt!

Also, I am wearing mine in a size medium! I suggest going a size smaller if you choose to wear it high waisted because without a belt I had some gap!!

Hope you all have a great Easter!

Xx, 4O1FIERCE

Less is more!

Happy February 1!!! Shortest month, but with the most goals I swear! I’ve never been obsessed over Valentine’s Day – however I wanted to at least get excited for something I love- Making less more!

Since I was younger I loved to take things from my closet and transform them. I loved DIY, and I loved to create and design my own outfits. When it comes to holidays and events 8/10 I decide to put stuff together that I already have in my closet. This way I always put my own twist on whatever I wear.

When the New Year came around I wanted to go through my closet and get rid of a tonnnn. I had the thought “less is more” in mind. Minimalism. I filmed a “Less is more with L’ange” video on my channel that I will be posting! I explain here how not only was my look simple and easy, but L’ange’s products make your look more, even only using 2 products like I did!

I have a lot of comments and messages sent to me weekly asking where I purchased this or that, or even just endless compliments saying “I love how you put things together,” “I love your outfit,” “style me.” It makes me happy knowing my creativity inspires other women.

I love to take clothes and transition them, I love to layer, I love to mix things together.

In my video I show you all how to take a simple shirt, hair style, and bold lip- and use these tips for any birthday, event, holiday, or night out!

Make sure to subscribe at – Life in the Fierce Lane

 

 

My healthy hair journey!

I’m bacccccck! I feel that out of all social media outlets I’ve been neglecting my blog the most, and I made a promise to continue to write, write, write. So now I will start overloading you guys with posts! If you do follow my other pages/channel you probably notice how much I’ve been posting about hair, hair, hair!

I work full time for an amazing company- L’ange! I love to hop on any chance I get to share a discount with my readers, because I’m telllllling you this brand will change your life!

First and foremost I’m such a low maintenance person in general, so I have always loved at least keeping up with a funky unique hair color-but ironically the first day out of the salon was pretty much the only day I wore it down and styled- haha

I just never took time/had time to straighten my entire head, curl it, you name it. When I discovered how quick and easy L’ange made it, I fell in loooooove; and began my hair journey!

Around this time last year I had super short, bright bleached platinum/silver hair. Loved it at the time-looking back now like yikes! Although my hair was freshly chopped it looked so dead, damaged, and sad. After trying out a few products from L’ange I knew I wanted to get more involved! I began using their purple shampoo and conditioner, nourishing gloss, dry shampoo, and root booster! (Not to mention their wand that i’ll never stop bragging about). Every single one of these products has made daily & weekly appearances in my hair routine!

I noticed not only did my hair look amazing, but it felt SO soft and healthy, and was growing like weeds! You can see all of my photos on my Instagram for first-hand proof! I only decided to chop my hair again because I’m not a fan of super long hair- all I do with long hair is throw it in a bun, and if it’s down I look like I’m 12!

After collecting a ton of tools and products from L’ange, it became life changing. Having a collection with everything you could possibly need makes it so easy to manage my hair routine, in such a quick and easy way!

Check out my journey through Instagram at @Kashaxmarie

And I also uploaded a video of my hair journey on my Youtube Channel – Life in the Fierce Lane

 

If you have any questions, or want an amazing discount feel free to reach out!

 

xx, 4O1fierce

Take a challenge! (my 28 day challenge with Personal Trainer Food)

Hey guys! For awhile I’ve considered going Vegan…then had to laugh at myself. I know I can do it, I just have a fear of losing too much weight and not being able to put it back on ( I used to have a hard time gaining and keeping weight before having children).

After 2 umbilical hernia repairs on my stomach, and giving birth to 2 babies (late, and 9lb+ a piece) I decided I really badly wanted to hit my goals of feeling comfortable about my stomach again.

We live in a generation of “plastic perfection,” and no disrespect, but there are less real than fake on social media. I didn’t want to fall into the category of being competitive with other females, or to compare myself to other images I’ve seen. Instead I pushed myself to share my journey, and inspire others to embrace their natural. Bullying is real, and it seems as if it’s more indirect these days. In order to reach my body goals, I knew I had to make a huge change in my meal prepping.

I’m back in school full time again, so I wanted to make sure I was eating on-the-go, and working out as much as possible!

I began using the 28-day meal plan from Personal Trainer Food and I was shocked at how delicious everything has been!

You just order your meal plan, pick your food choices, and it ships right to your door-ready to throw in the freezer!

I uploaded a full review on my Youtube channel here – What I eat to see results!

If you are interested and have any questions feel free to send me a comment! Use my code ‘fierce175’ to save $175 on your meal plan!!

Want to see more? Head over to my instagram page at @kashaxmarie to see my entire fitness journey!!

 

Xx, 4o1fierce

What’s in my bag?

Back again, I have less than 4 days until I’m back in full-time student mode, so I figured I would squeeze in as much content as possible! Blog sets will turn to tests so so soon-sigh.

So I’ve always been a big bag woman! Not “big ‘into’ bags,” but have had a love for big  bags. I throw everythinnnnnng in it, which is such a love-hate relationship.

A few months back I was sent a diaper bag/backpack/tote from Lily Jade 

I will be uploading a video on our Youtube  Channel tomorrow with all of these items I’ll be writing about here.

Being a mom “on-the-go,” means I throw everything in my bag, this is exactly why I needed a huge bag that’s sturdy, won’t bend or break, and one that will last!

The first item that always goes from my desk to my bag is my dry shampoo from L’ange

I love this dry shampoo specifically for the way it makes my hair feel and look! Usually other dry shampoos -yes correct the greasy hair, but they leave my hair feeling dry and brittle! I swear this dry shampoo is called deja vu because it brings me back to the exact moment my hair was freshly washed and dried!

It doesn’t have a color to it, so I don’t have to worry about putting this in my hair in a careful fashion-just spray, shake, and done!

I also really love how the packaging has a tight cap, so when I throw it in my bag on-the-daily, I never have spills!

You can find the dry shampoo here —> Deja Vu

Next I talked about a few more items in my bag- these amazing, thick diapers/wipes from Parasol , my favorite mascara called ‘Grand opening’ by KB  and an amazing scar cream that I’ve been using post-surgery from CELSUS!

My last 2 items I chose to share were a few more beauty items – first the Maracuja oil by Tarte , and lastly one I’m insanely crazy over, L’ange’s Root Booster

I feel as if the Root Booster and the Dry Shampoo are the dynamic duo! When my hair goes flat and greasy, especially with 2-3 day hair, or right after a work out; I find these guys are the best solution! As I said, the dry shampoo revives my hair, and this root booster gives me so much volume and fluff! I’m obsessed with the results!

I get crazy volume when I apply it to my damp hair and then blow dry it, but just as much volume with dry, flat hair! You can see the results in all of my videos where I show before and afters!

I could go on and on about every little item in my bag, it’s huge and jam packed; but these have been my go-to’s over these past few months! I would love to hear some feedback from you all about any ideas or questions you may have!

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xx, 4o1fierce